Much of what I do with Fit For The Kingdon is coaching people out of seasons of hurt. Primarily, that lot falls to pastors, church planters, and church staff as I can offer a greater level of empathy, seeing as how that’s what I am and I understand from experience. It ceratinly doesn’t stop there. I coach athletes, businessmen, lawyers, etc. People from all walks of life. The interesting thing that I have found is where or better yet, who these people are. On the surface,many of the ones that I coach go unnoticed becuae of their facade of strength. They’re leaders, elite performers. Just this past weekend I was surpirsed to find this to be true with a professional elite athlete that I had an interview with. Why did this surprise me? In the words of U2, “Everybody hurts”. I was able to minister to him and create a spiritually connected relationship that has hopes of repairing the damage of stress and pain.
Hidden hurt amongst strength.
I’m a high performer. I never stop gong, I keep plates spinning, and I soin them well. Most people would never be able to identify me going through a difficult season. Unfortunaelt, as a high performer, I often refuse to let that darkness break through the cracks of my facade. As a matter of fact, as a matter of fact, as I write this blog, I do so from a convention of the gathering of pastors from all over the Commonwealth. The last time it was held here, I spent two day here walking around in pain so severe thav I could barely function, and no one noticed – A darkness that I will never forget. Today I’m recovered, yet I’m reminded to look clossley at those who walk past me or shake my hand with a smile. Many of them are secretly hurting. As, a matter of fact, within an hour of arriving yesterday at this convention, a fellow pastor took me aside to plead for help as he is severely afflicted. He is an exception to the rule, as most will fake it till they make it.
It’s hard to identify hidden pain wrapped in strength. I believe the reason it’s so hard, however, is that we aren’t looking. We don’t consider high performers, or “strong” people who are able to fake it till they make it. I would just say, stop and re-consider what it takes to be such a high performer. Re-consider the stresses that must go into keeping all those plates spinning. Re-consider that as a high performer, they don’t possess the emotional lingual skills to even know how to ask for help. (Meaning) they know how to be strong emotionally, yet they don’t know how to be weak and vulerable enough to let it out.
The next time you encounter someone who is ‘gettin it done’, would you keep in mind that that apparent strength and perfomance may be that person’s greatest weakness, blockading a hidden world of secret pain? Maybe it’s you. If you are going throu such a season, I implore you to allow someone the right to know, and the right to speak and minister to you. If you feel so lonely and isolated that you feel there is no one, let me assure you there is. His name is Jesus. And He invites anyone who is burdened or heavy laden to come to Him that they may find rest for their souls. He is a friend that sticks closer than even a brother. I hope that you might call out to Him and allow hime to be your strength during your time of weakness.